Polly - Slušam svoj unutarnji poriv i radim ono sto želim / I listen to my inner urge and do what I want
Moje ime je Polena. Da, najvjerojatnije jedina Polena u u Hrvatskoj, zemlji u kojoj sam se rodila. Zovite me Polly. Od mnoštva mojih nadimaka, Polly mi je glavni koji je zapravo i moje umjetničko ime. Možda će zvučati čudno, ali tako me zovu svi osim moje obitelji. Naime, rođena sam u glavnom gradu Hrvatske. To je mali, ali meni drag, grad Zagreb u kojem sam i odrasla. Ostavit ću vas u nedoumici sto se tiče mojih godina jer sam nekim čudom ostala zamrznuta. No,budući da sve ima svoj “rok trajanja”, samo čekam trenutak kad ću početi primjećivati da se lagano odmrzavam. Reci ću vam samo da sam rođena 15.9., baš na pola mjeseca.
My name is Polena. Probably the only Polena in Croatia, the country where I was born. Call me Polly. Of the multitude of my nicknames, Polly is my main one which is actually my stage name as well. It may sound weird, but that’s what everyone calls me except my family. Namely, I was born in the capital of Croatia. It is a small, but dear to me, city of Zagreb, where I grew up. I will leave you in doubt as far as my age is concerned because I miraculously stayed frozen. But since everything has its “shelf life,” I’m just waiting for the moment when I’ll start to notice that I’m thawing slightly. I'll just tell you that I was born on September 15th, exactly half a month.
Inače, do sad sam i u životu radila sve na pola. Puno toga sam započela i zatim odustala, ili nešto nikada nisam završila. Unatoč tome što je moja glavna poslovica “Nikad ne reci nikad”, gledajući realnost, što znači da s obzirom na svoje godine i sadašnje mogućnosti znam da neke stvari nikada vise necu moći ostvariti. Uostalom, ne možemo se vratiti u budućnost. Godine idu, samo lete i mi ih ne možemo zaustaviti. Ja sam zato zaključila da trebam živjeti svaki dan onako kao želim, kao mi govori moj unutarnji glas. On najbolje zna. Jer pješčani sat curi. Možda će glas katkada pogriješiti. Ali na greškama se uči, zar ne?
Budući da bih vam u ovom pisanom intervjuu trebala govoriti o svom modelingu i kako sam se odlučila krenut fotkati, prijeđimo na stvar… Ja zapravo od malena želim biti model. Nisam ja kao mala curica znala točno ˝kaj˝ to znači, ali sam često govorila mami kako želim glumiti u reklamama. Zapravo, mogu reći da sam željela biti pomalo eksponirana. Kada bih sagledala stvari bolje, zaključila bih da sam više željela biti glumica nego klasični model koji se fotka za reklame ili manekenka. Razočarana ljudima oko sebe, u jednom trenutku svoga života jako sam se povukla u sebe. Mama mi je uvijek bila podrška u svemu (iako uvijek s dozom skepse prema svemu), tako i u tome da započnem modeling koji mi je bio velika želja. Unatoč svojoj “nedovoljnoj” visini, krenula sam spontano; jer stvari najbolje ispadnu kada ih radite spontano. Neću previse govoriti o fotografima s kojima sam surađivala, no reći ću da se jako kratko bavim s modelingom i da dam se prvi put fotkala u 2. mjesecu 2020. godine kod jednog simpatičnog fotografa Kristijana Sormana. To prvo fotkanje mi je ostalo u jako lijepom sjećanju. Tada sam otkrila da prirodno znam pozirati, kao da sam se već ranije bavila s modelingom, a to mi je i Kristijan potvrdio. To me je dodatno potaknulo i pomoglo da postanem svijesna svoga tijela i da se ničega ne trebam sramiti. Zatim sam imala još par shootinga s nekoliko fotografa, a među njima je i moj prijatelj kojeg znam od 1. razreda osnovne škole. Fotkanje mu je hobi, ali je napravio vrhunske fotke sa mnom. Kao ˝profi˝! U prilogu će biti dostavljene neke fotografije u CK vešu i umjetničke u prirodi. To je njegov rad. Ja sam tek sada počela živjeti. Shvatila sam to ljetos u 2020-oj godini. Nikada nisam imala cilj. Nemam ga ni sada. Iskreno, ne mogu reći da je to dobro, a niti loše. Samo znam da sada ako nešto želim, idem po to. Ma kaj god to bilo. Jer svaki sat je bitan, ma čak i minuta. Hoću li ostvariti nešto ili ne, to nije bitno. Slušam svoj umutarnji poriv i radim ono sto želim. Jer ljudi, život je kratak! Prekratak! Idem po to bez obzira na prepreke koje se mogu naći na putu -jer imala sam ih do sada i naučila sam se boriti s njima. Možda će zvučati čudno, ali sada ih gledam kao nešto dobro; pokušavam okrenuti stvari u svoju korist…Nešto iz čeka mogu samo naučiti nove stvari izvuci korisnu pouku. Jer život je igra, poput video - igrice s preprekama na putu. A zamislite samo da nema prepreka. Bilo bi dosadno. Zar ne? Zato treba igrati igru. Ja sam odlučila igrati. Sama sam sebi šef.
Budućnost ću prepusti spontanitetu i ne zadavati si nekakve prevelike ciljeve koji možda nisu realizirajući zbog toga što ne možemo predvidjeti budućnost. Planiram da planovi ne ispadaju kako su planirani. Eto, 2020. je donijela koronu u cijelom svijetu i potrese u Hrvatskoj, što baš i nismo predviđali… No, bez obzira na sve, 2020. godina mi nije ostala u negativnom sjećanju jer sam spontano iskusila puno stvari koje sam željela (neke podsvjesno, a neke skrozsvjesno). Naučila sam nešto o ljudima, što je jako bitno čime god da se bavimo. Ne treba dopustiti negativnostima ustupiti mjesto u vlastitom životu. Ne dopustiti da nas netko radi budalama. Ako baš želite biti budale, da malo zabavite okolinu, onda se sami napravite takvimasvjesno. I ono sto mi je mama (moj uzor i moja podrška u svemu) uvijek govorila i sada govori,budi ono sto jesi, nikada nemoj glumiti ono sto nisi. Toga se treba držati i sve će sjest na svoje mjesto. Jer glumi se u filmovima, a ne u stvarnom životu.
Što se modelinga tiče, zanimaju me razne vrsta shootinga (uglavnom sve osim čistog akta) pa do glume u reklamama, spotovima i svega ostalog. Okušala bih se u različitim scenama u filmovima i serijama.
Također planiram napraviti shooting u paru, najvjerojatnije s dečkom kojeg odaberem. Voljela bih i posjetiti neke zemlje u kojim nisam bila i tamo također napraviti kvalitetne fotografije. Ako se bilo nešto od toga realizira moći ćete sve vidjeti na mom instagramu @polenastanic. Želim zahvaliti fotografima Gordanu Kosu, Franu Šepatu i Kristijanu Sormanu na odličnoj suradnji i fotografijama koje ćete vidjeti dolje u prilogu. Nadam se daljnjoj uspješnoj suradnji s njima te se radujem novim izazovima.
By the way, so far I have done everything in half in my life. I started a lot and then gave up, or something I never finished. Despite my main proverb being “Never say never,” looking at reality, which means that given my age and current capabilities I know that some things I will never be able to accomplish again. After all, we cannot go back to the future. The years go by, they just fly and we can’t stop them. I therefore concluded that I should live each day the way I want to, as my inner voice tells me. He knows best. Because the hourglass is leaking. Maybe the voice will go wrong sometimes.
But one learns from mistakes, right?
Since in this written interview I should tell you about my modeling and how I decided to start taking photos, let's get to the point… I actually want to be a model since I was little. As a little girl, I didn't know exactly "what" that meant, but I often told my mother that I wanted to act in commercials. In fact, I can say that I wanted to be a bit exposed. If I looked at things better, I would conclude that I wanted to be an actress more than a classic model who takes a photo for commercials or a model. Disappointed with the people around me, at one point in my life I was very withdrawn. My mother was always supportive in everything (although always with a dose of skepticism towards everything), as well as in starting modeling, which was my great wish. Despite my “insufficient” height, I set off spontaneously; because things turn out best when you do them spontaneously. I will not talk too much about the photographers I have worked with, but I will say that I have been dealing with modeling for a very short time and that I took my photos for the first time in February 2020 with a nice photographer Kristijan Sorman. That first photo shoot remained in my very fond memory. Then I discovered that I can pose naturally, as if I had done modeling before, and Kristijan confirmed that to me. This further encouraged me and helped me become aware of my body and not have to be ashamed of anything. Then I had a couple more shots with a few photographers, and among them is a friend I have known since 1st grade of elementary school. Photography is his hobby, but he took top photos with me. Like a pro! Attached will be some photos in CK underwear and art in nature. That is his work. I have only just begun to live. I realized that this summer in 2020. I never had a goal. I don't have it now. Honestly, I can’t say it’s good, nor bad. I just know that now if I want something, I go for it. Whatever it is. Because every hour counts, even minutes. Whether I accomplish something or not doesn’t matter. I listen to my inner urge and do what I want. Because people, life is short! Too short! I’m going for it no matter what obstacles may be found along the way — because I’ve had them so far and I’ve learned to deal with them. It may sound strange, but now I see them as something good; I try to turn things to my advantage… Something from the check can only teach new things to draw a useful lesson. Because life is a game, like a video game with obstacles along the way. And just imagine that there are no obstacles. It would be boring. Is it? That's why you need to play the game. I decided to play. I'm my own boss.
I will leave the future to spontaneity and not set myself any oversized goals that may not be achievable because we cannot predict the future. I plan that the plans do not turn out as planned. Well, 2020 brought a crown all over the world and earthquakes in Croatia, which we didn't really anticipate… But no matter what, 2020 didn't stay in my negative memory because I spontaneously experienced a lot of things I wanted (some subconsciously, and some fully consciously). I learned something about people, which is very important no matter what we do. Negativities should not be allowed to give way in their own lives. Don’t let anyone make fools of us. If you really want to be a fool, to entertain the environment a little, then make yourself so consciously. And what my mom (my role model and my support in everything) always said and still says, be what you are, never pretend what you are not. That should be kept and everything will fall into place. Because he acts in movies, not in real life.
As far as modeling is concerned, I am interested in various types of shooting (mostly everything except pure nude) to acting in commercials, videos, and everything else. I would try myself in different scenes in movies and series.
I also plan to do a shoot in pairs, most likely with the guy I choose. I would also like to visit some countries I have not been to and also take quality photos there. If any of this is realized you will be able to see it all on my Instagram @polenastanic. I want to thank the photographers Gordan Kos, Fran Šepat, and Kristijan Sorman for the excellent collaboration and the photos you will see below in the attachment. I hope for further successful cooperation with them and look forward to new challenges.
Photographers:
Fran Šepat
